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Do you find yourself struggling to regulate your emotions, feeling either overwhelmed or numb?
When faced with cancer, it's common to feel like your body has betrayed you, leaving you wondering how to heal not just physically, but emotionally and spiritually too.
Dr. Katie Deming sits down with Elli Richter, a renowned subconscious integrative therapist, to explore the techniques that are revolutionizing the way we approach wellness. Elli's unique expertise lies in combining the power of Psych-K, a proven method for reprogramming limiting beliefs, with somatic practices that help regulate the nervous system and promote mind-body harmony.
Key takeaways:
Understand how unresolved trauma and negative beliefs can manifest as physical symptoms
Learn about the power of Psych-K and somatic practices for reprogramming the subconscious mind and regulating the nervous system
Discover a simple, daily exercise to tune your vagus nerve and promote deep relaxation and healing
Chapters:
07:00 – The difference between “feel better” and “get better” tools
12:30 – How the subconscious mind governs the autonomic nervous system
18:00 – Understanding the “window of tolerance” and its significance in therapy
30:00 – Psych-K vs. traditional talk therapy
42:00 – Integrating human design into therapy for tailored lifestyle practices
60:00 – A powerful daily exercise to tune the vagus nerve and promote healing
Eli shares her personal journey from physical therapy to discovering the profound impact of addressing the subconscious mind and how this led her to develop her holistic approach to healing.
You'll gain a deeper understanding of how unresolved trauma and negative thought patterns can manifest as physical symptoms, keeping you trapped in cycles of stress, anxiety, and dis-ease. Elli explains the critical difference between “feel better” tools, such as talk therapy, which provide temporary relief, and “get better” tools, like subconscious integrative therapy, which address the root causes of emotional and physical pain.
They explore the concept of the “window of tolerance,” a state where the nervous system is regulated and can handle stress effectively, and how Elli's approach aims to help clients stay within this window by addressing subconscious issues and using somatic practices.
Elli breaks down step-by-step a simple, yet powerful exercise that you can incorporate into your daily routine to tune your vagus nerve and promote a state of deep relaxation and healing. The vagus nerve plays a crucial role in regulating the body's stress responses, and techniques to tone this nerve can help individuals reduce symptoms like anxiety, depression, and physical ailments.
She also touches on human design, a tool she uses to understand her clients' unique energy types and tailor lifestyle and self-care practices accordingly. By aligning with their natural tendencies and strengths, clients can more easily adopt healthy habits and achieve their goals.
Listen, learn and break free from the patterns that have been holding you back and embark on a journey of true, lasting healing, tune in now and discover how to unleash the power of your mind-body connection!
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Don't Face Cancer Alone
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Read the Transcript Below:
[00:01:04] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Expect to uncover new insights, share a few laughs, and maybe even shed some tears. But most of all, we'll learn how to heal from within together. So let's dive into today's episode.
[00:01:17] Dr. Katie Deming MD: I am thrilled to invite Ellie Richter, who does subconscious integrative therapy to the show, Ellie, thank you so much for being here.
[00:01:27] Elli Richter: Thank you so much for having me.
[00:01:29] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So, you know, I [00:01:30] want to just jump right in and actually I would love to hear how you landed in this work.
[00:01:37] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Like what was your path to coming to subconscious integrative therapy?
[00:01:41] Elli Richter: Yeah, I love telling the story. it's been a windy road of experimentation of trial and error. And as you can hear from my accent, I'm from Germany and Germans are known for being very academic and precise. So that's kind of like what I grew up in. So most of my life, I thought I wanted to be a doctor because I always knew I wanted to [00:02:00] help people.
[00:02:00] Elli Richter: So I was very much subconsciously brainwashed to believe that the way that you help people, so you become a doctor. I ended up choosing physical therapy and went to college for physical therapy in Germany. And during that time, I discovered that what people were complaining about. you know, I already sensed that it was way more in their minds and in their emotions and that the physical expression was really just a symptom, not necessarily the root cause, but I didn't have the words for it.
[00:02:28] Elli Richter: And actually, when I was [00:02:30] 19, I went on a vacation with my mother and discovered a book that was probably similar to the book, The Body Keeps Score, which is one of the profound books that talks about the connection of trauma and your subconscious And your emotions and your physical health. And that book had a huge impact on me.
[00:02:49] Elli Richter: And based on that book, I became a physical therapist. And then when I met my ex husband, he's American. I fell in love and followed him to the States and my degree wasn't transferred. Initially, I was [00:03:00] a little bit angry, but then I realized it's an opportunity, you know, and physical therapy, you see three, three patients in an hour and,Eight hours a day.
[00:03:09] Elli Richter: And it feels pretty ineffective, you know, and I was really eventually appreciative to have an opportunity to start again. So out of my degree and what I've already had learned, I was kind of like pushed into entrepreneurship at age 23 when I immigrated. So I started as a, just teaching classes and I had.
[00:03:28] Elli Richter: Become a fitness trainer [00:03:30] during college in Germany to, you know, earn a little extra money. So I was able to teach classes, do personal training, and I realized I can bring my physical therapy knowledge into the personal training, became a holistic personal trainer, but I always in the back of my head had this, Believe that that wasn't good enough because it wasn't academic enough.
[00:03:48] Elli Richter: So I went back to college in, uh, Charleston, South Carolina for health, education and psychology. And during that time I went deep into spirituality. I had a spiritual mentor. I stopped [00:04:00] drinking alcohol. That was at age 25, 26. I started to really discover myself and I really liked what I was doing with him.
[00:04:08] Elli Richter: So I became a life coach and combined all my knowledge that I had from my college degrees to helping people more holistically through their, initially it was with health, you know, through their health issues and their weight issues.
[00:04:23] Elli Richter: But then I realized, It's really all of life and I became trained as a life coach, did [00:04:30] several certification in Ayurveda, meditation and started to really work with people deeply on helping them change their life and change their behavior. And whenever you work with people on behavior change, you eventually come up against a huge block and that's their subconscious mind.
[00:04:46] Elli Richter: You know, you know what to do and then why, why do we know what to do and don't do it? You know, why do we keep not following our intuition? Why do we keep abandoning ourselves? Why do we keep betraying ourselves? So I got really curious about how I could keep helping myself and [00:05:00] others. Because in 2017, as it so goes, life has kept pushing me into discomfort and trauma and challenging situations.
[00:05:08] Elli Richter: My marriage had ended, my dad passed away, the house I was living in had black mold. So there was a lot of things that And I realized I need more resources and I keep bumping up against the trauma that I thought I had already dealt with, you know, and I realized that the tools that I was using, [00:05:30] it was kind of like going to the dentist with a broken leg, you know, it was nice.
[00:05:34] Elli Richter: The dentist would say, I understand you're in pain. That was nice, but the tools weren't really working, you know, so I had accumulated a lot of feel better tools, but not get better tools. And I like to, you know, with all due respect, I think talk therapy is very much a feel better tool, but the get better tool was missing the working on the underbelly, the root cause for our emotional pain, for our physical pain, for the way that we're [00:06:00] acting and showing up.
[00:06:01] Elli Richter: So I found Psyche.and the minute I found it, my life changed. I changed my entire praxis the next day. All my coaching clients were now subconscious integrative therapy clients. And then I realized everything I learned so far is still super valuable. It's just all clicking it together. And that's how I combined somatic practices.
[00:06:23] Elli Richter: So the nervous system care, working with the vagus nerve, helping you to feel better day to day, and then [00:06:30] the subconscious practice is really helping you to get better, upgrading your software and combining the two to give people a really integrated, holistic approach to their mental health. That is also very empowering.
[00:06:42] Elli Richter: So it's not dependent on the practitioner or, you know, but it's like you are resourced and I hope to resource my clients so much that they feel empowered in for the rest of their lives. to handle anything that comes their way and also to really step into their magic and their gifts.
[00:06:59] Dr. Katie Deming MD: I [00:07:00] love that. Well, and I think also for our listeners who, you know, may not be as familiar with the conscious and subconscious mind is like, you know, talk therapy and doing things that we are consciously aware of is conscious, you know, affecting the conscious mind, but that only affects 5 percent of our behaviors and our thoughts and actions, where of 95 percent of our behaviors, actions are driven by, and believe so by the subconscious mind.
[00:07:28] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And so I love that. [00:07:30] I love the analogy of going to the dentist with the broken leg because it's like, there are these different pieces and also I love how you said the feel good work versus the get well, um, work and having those two. And also what I love. As you describe your work of integrating the somatic work with the subconscious work, it's like you're using something that helps them feel good in the moment, the somatic nervous system work, so that then they can do the work of the subconscious to get [00:08:00] better as well.
[00:08:00] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So combining those two is, is really beautiful. So I wonder if you could tell us a little bit about. That integration of the two, the somatic and the nervous system, and why also regulation of the nervous system is so important as you're doing this work on the subconscious level.
[00:08:18] Elli Richter: Yeah, I actually love to piggyback on what I just heard you say. I do it the opposite way. When somebody comes to me in great distress, the first thing we'll do is subconscious work.
[00:08:26] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Oh, interesting.
[00:08:27] Elli Richter: Because when you're in distress, You can [00:08:30] certainly, when you're alone on your own, I teach you how to do somatic work. So if you're not trained in subconscious work, your best first choice is physiology first, working with your nervous system.
[00:08:40] Elli Richter: Now if you can work with psyche, if you're trained in it or you have a facilitator, my first choice whenever I'm encountering anything is psyche and working with my subconscious mind and here's why. With Psyche, within seconds to minutes, you can completely come out of a trauma or a stress, and you're out of [00:09:00] it.
[00:09:00] Elli Richter: With somatic care, it's sort of you're treating the symptom, but then it comes back. You know, and here's why the subconscious mind makes, as you know, 95 to 99 percent of our entire consciousness. Now, this part of our consciousness actually governs our nervous system and our physiology. So the governor to the autonomic nervous system is the subconscious.
[00:09:22] Elli Richter: So the autonomic nervous system responds to what's going on in our subconscious. So a lot of people don't know that they're living with [00:09:30] constant stress. that constantly shows up in the nervous system. And the nervous system always responds appropriately to our subconscious programs in our environment.
[00:09:40] Elli Richter: And people know about the nervous system by knowing about the fight flight freeze reaction. You know that most people have that understanding. We have this automatic animal instinct nervous system that keeps us safe. Now, there's an expression called window of tolerance when you're, when your nervous system is nicely humming and you're regulated and [00:10:00] you're not in fight flight freeze, you have plenty of bandwidth and you're inside of the window of tolerance.
[00:10:05] Elli Richter: Now, a couple of symptoms when you're inside of the window of tolerance, you're sleeping well. You're pooping well, your mood's stable, your emotions are stable, you can handle stress well, you can have tough conversations, you can show up for the things, you don't drop balls, you know. So being inside of the window of tolerance is a great place to be.
[00:10:24] Elli Richter: And most people's issues, believe it or not, are because they're outside of the window of tolerance and [00:10:30] dysregulated. So once you leave the window of tolerance and you come to the edges, that's when you get reactive. That's when you shut down. That's when you start to blame other people or you are so overwhelmed that you can't respond to a text or you experience anxiety or in bad, in like really strong cases, you have, depression and panic attacks, you know, can't sleep and all these disorders that then people show up as a therapist office or doctor's offices, basically our nervous system, [00:11:00] dysregulating symptoms, right?
[00:11:02] Elli Richter: It's like the, the seven heads of the Hydra, you know, that story of the Hydras, the Greek mythology story where there's a, the monster is the Hydra and has seven heads and every time you try to cut off one head. 10 more pop out basically. And that's how it is with treating somatic symptoms. You know, you start with the gut health and then you discover there's this and then there's that because our nervous system connects our brain, our heart and our gut.
[00:11:27] Elli Richter: Through the vagus nerve, the vagus nerve [00:11:30] is the most important longest nerve and working with the vagus nerve directly You can help yourself feel better and get back into the window of tolerance. It's amazing however, if you don't also go to the governor the subconscious and clear the emotional burden Basically junk we have accumulated through our lives.
[00:11:49] Elli Richter: The constant stress in your nervous system will always be there. I'm a perfect example of that. Like, I started using somatic practices, breathwork, meditation in my mid twenties. [00:12:00] Now 46, and until I found Psyche and Subconscious Integration, it was almost a full time job to have to, to regulate my nervous system every day, because I was living with several unresolved capital T traumas in my subconscious.
[00:12:16] Elli Richter: That were constantly moving through my physiology and my nervous system, even though I was every day doing the feel better tools. But the feel better tools didn't go to the root cause to nip it. They just helped me manage my symptoms. And to be [00:12:30] honest with you, Katie, at some point, I was so tired of managing my symptoms.
[00:12:34] Elli Richter: I almost, I, I got so cynical and depressed that I almost said F this to all of it, you know, and then through some divine intervention, Psyche found me. And that changed everything because I was trying, I was developing and expanding my conscious mind and my spiritual mind, but never updating my software.
[00:12:55] Elli Richter: So eventually that disconnect felt like a constant push pull in my nervous system and in my [00:13:00] behaviors. So, All of that said, when you have unresolved trauma or negative beliefs, they show up in your nervous system. Your nervous system is supposed to do that. It's supposed to react with stress to bullshit.
[00:13:12] Elli Richter: Basically, negative beliefs are bullshit. So your nervous system says bullshit, you know, and reacts with stress. So we just been so conditioned to look at nervous system dysregulation as something wrong and the pathology. And that's my number one criticism with the mental health space. [00:13:30] We're pathologizing the human experience when really your nervous system reacting to trauma and to the insanity that's going on around us by giving you anxiety is appropriate.
[00:13:42] Elli Richter: It's not a pathology. It's your body telling you exactly where to go and what to do. And I love that through this work, people feel safe enough to start to listen. They start to feel safe again in their bodies and nervous system to be able to listen to their bodies [00:14:00] and to be able to actually say, I'm here now and I'm listening and I'm doing, I'm following you.
[00:14:05] Elli Richter: And that's what I think is the most profound outcome, you know, to bring those, bring mind and body again together and not so much at war. So I know I went a little bit around, but I hope I answered your
[00:14:16] Dr. Katie Deming MD: no, no, no. Yeah. And I love that. And also I was, when I was listening to you describe your experience, I'm like, this is why it's exhausting is that it's just physically exhausting. And this is why [00:14:30] ultimately trauma impacts our body physically. And we develop illness is because it is exhausting even when we think like maybe we've.
[00:14:39] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Talked about this and resolved it on a conscious level, if it's still running in the background, and you're constantly fighting that and activated your nervous system, your sympathetic nervous system, it's exhausting. and then I love how you said that. This is like, It's appropriate actually that your nervous system is bringing this to your attention to let you know, Hey, there's something here [00:15:00] that needs deeper healing.
[00:15:02] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And, um, so I love that. No, all of that was really helpful. And I think, you know, you're the second provider that I've had on to talk about psych K and the other one describes exactly what you said, that he went to a two day workshop and his. Life changed on day one, like after day one, he went home and he was changed.
[00:15:21] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And so I'm wondering, can you describe to us, like, what is that that is happening, you know, in this training that is so profound that it shifts [00:15:30] like that. And also, I mean, now you probably see it in your practice. Cause I see it when I send clients to do psych K they'll have profound shifts in one session.
[00:15:40] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And, and they're always like, well, you know what? I've done therapy, I've done all these things, and then it's like, wow, it really does shift things so quickly.
[00:15:48] Elli Richter: Well, when you, it's hard to describe it. It's kind of like,if you ever done, uh, planned medicine or something, how did you, how did you, how do you describe a shift in consciousness? So I'm going to attempt this as [00:16:00] best as I can from a more left brain perspective and then a right brain perspective. So from a left brain perspective, what we're doing is.
[00:16:07] Elli Richter: We're increasing blood flow to the neocortex and the hemispheres so that the hemispheres can come online again and communicate and have more bridges over the corpus callosum so you can access more of your mental resources. So you're in a state of super learning. So when you're basically In Psyche with, there's, about 10 or more different processes of [00:16:30] super learning.
[00:16:31] Elli Richter: They involve, sometimes breathwork, sometimes the whole brain state, sometimes different techniques that you might know from other modalities, but in a, in a combined in a new way so that the person that's using these techniques can go into a state of super learning. And within seconds to minutes shift the perception of an event.
[00:16:52] Elli Richter: or of a situation. And when you change your perception, it's a miracle. The definition of a miracle is a shift in perception. [00:17:00] So when you not just realized, Oh my gosh, it wasn't my fault, but not only that, it happened for me. And not only that I'm good enough and not only that I'm lovable, not only that there's nothing wrong with me. You can never go back. And it's not just that you, it sounds like a nice idea, but because you're integrated into your subconscious and because your subconscious governs your body and your emotions, you feel it to be true. The difference between conscious work and [00:17:30] subconscious is your subconscious governs your emotions, not your conscious.
[00:17:34] Elli Richter: So you can consciously tell yourself I'm good enough. And that sounds like a nice momentarily relief. Yeah, of course I'm good enough, but you don't feel it right here in your cells. And why not? Why don't we feel these nice ideas? Because our subconscious governs ourselves and how we feel, not the conscious.
[00:17:53] Elli Richter: The subconscious governs ourselves and how we feel. So when you have a new belief, like I'm lovable or [00:18:00] I'm good enough, or I'm forgiven, every cell of your body is relaxed. Every cell of your body vibrates at that frequency. If you close a trauma loop that you've been living on for 50 years, 30 years, a week, two weeks, two years, and suddenly, That stress from that event and that perception that you used to have, like, you know, we have a perception of a trauma that immediately gets us into that same emotional state.
[00:18:26] Elli Richter: Once you release that emotional state, that becomes wisdom. [00:18:30] So a memory without the charge of the emotion has wisdom. So out of the sudden, again, you have the wisdom from that. It's like you, you're living your wisdom now, like you closed. I imagine that trauma loop. from what happened and now it's become wisdom.
[00:18:45] Elli Richter: It's so integrated. It doesn't hurt you anymore, but it's empowering you now. And that's why people feel so much better right away because you're working on your entire consciousness, not just your logical part or your [00:19:00] muscles, your entire consciousness shifts and permanently shifts. Yes.
[00:19:06] Dr. Katie Deming MD: actually. and one thing that you said in there is that it's, you know, you didn't use this word necessarily, but it, it creates, you said like a shift in the feeling that they have, but it's like experience, you know, as human beings, we learn through experience and this process gives them that insight.
[00:19:27] Dr. Katie Deming MD: a new experience in their body that [00:19:30] then they now are imprinted and that's programmed. And, and it's something that's almost hard to explain. And you're right. You know, I, through the past year have used Psych K. So Psych K was the modality that I use to heal a whole bunch of trauma, not just my trauma of leaving Western medicine and getting a divorce and having this shared death experience, but also stuff from my childhood as well.
[00:19:55] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And it is. It's fast and it's, there's so many layers to one of the [00:20:00] things that I've found is that, you know, I can send clients and they can have one session and actually make tremendous progress. But for myself, I, I went deep and I was like, okay, now what's the next layer and then the next layer, just to keep going, to get to that place, to clear as much as I possibly can, because, and I think this is one of the things that is, as I've moved.
[00:20:24] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Out of my traditional practice into this space and talking a lot about emotions and a lot about trauma. A lot of [00:20:30] people don't want to talk about it and are afraid. And like, you're saying this is my fault or, you know, like, Oh, so now it's my fault that I have cancer. Like, is that enough that I have cancer now?
[00:20:40] Dr. Katie Deming MD: It's my fault. It's like, no, no, no, no, no. We are all getting traumatized by so many things. From the world that we live in and not like to, you know, our family is not as well at fault. They're also reliving their traumas. And, and so it's just this recognizing that we all have these things and that there are [00:21:00] tools that are amazing that can help move you through and, and move through quickly.
[00:21:06] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Um, so I loved, I love hearing all of that. I love how you explained to, or that you corrected me on that you use, you know, the psych K first, the subconscious work first, and that the somatic work, you know, the feel good stuff is more for people to do on their own.
[00:21:22] Dr. Katie Deming MD: But. Clearly, when you have an experienced practitioner with, like yourself, the first work is, is start to get working on the [00:21:30] subconscious, but I'm wondering if you can talk about how you're integrating those two and what does that look like in bringing the somatic work into your psyche practice?
[00:21:40] Elli Richter: Yes. To, to go back, I, before I started Psyche in this work, I was already a holistic life coach, and I was already working with people on all topics. So I had people come to me for health, for a career change. You know, I worked with a lot of entrepreneurs, a lot of therapists and coaches come to me lately.
[00:21:59] Elli Richter: I've had a [00:22:00] lot of doctors, which is really exciting, you know, so a lot of entrepreneurs, a lot of leaders are coming to this work to change you. Any areas of their life. And then I added psyche and so it kept going that I don't have a niche people come to me with all kinds of things, you know, and usually You know, referral, Instagram, whatever it is.
[00:22:19] Elli Richter: And then the way that I integrated is I, I teach people how to take care of themselves. I call it flexible, bliss, discipline, and I, as a, as a holistic life coach, all I did is [00:22:30] teach people flexible, bliss, discipline. So basically teach them good habits based on their energy type. So I, I, I integrate what I, what's called human design.
[00:22:39] Elli Richter: I wrote a little book about it. WTF is human design. So people can like introduce themselves. It's basically. An archetype,type understanding Amanda and Jess, who you're working with. And now they're working with the gene keys and human design. And so I even, so let's say you come to me and I look at your human design and your gene key.
[00:22:59] Elli Richter: So I [00:23:00] understand what lifestyle would be ideal for you. So my lifestyle is ideal for me. But not for you and not for the next person, you know? And so I help people with these somatic tools and with understanding of human design to also empower themselves in their day to day to really change their lives.
[00:23:15] Elli Richter: Because the truth is, and what I see as one of the biggest issues is victim mentality. We go to doctors or to practitioners or to therapists and we're like, fix me. You know, instead of realizing we're not victims, we're lighthouses, we have to participate. [00:23:30] Nobody's saving us. Not psychay, not somatic tools.
[00:23:33] Elli Richter: We are the medicine. You are the powerful healer and you can use these tools and resources and people are here to support you, but ultimately we have to come out of victim. So I've noticed that people sometimes because Psyche is so mystical and magical. And they're like, Oh my God, if I can just reprogram my subconscious, I don't have to do anything.
[00:23:53] Elli Richter: You know, I've noticed that that sometimes sneaks in. So I'm very clear, like psyche is a resource and that's very powerful. And you [00:24:00] still have to show up and change your life. You still have to speak up, set boundaries, do what you love, you know, take care of yourself, move your body, eat well, you know, all those things.
[00:24:10] Elli Richter: So that's how I combine it. I help people. create a flexible discipline with healthy rituals and healthy self care so that they stay connected to themselves, that they continue to expand their consciousness and to continue to really grow and make lasting and sustainable changes in their life. Not just a [00:24:30] temporary, like, you know, have a quick session, but I like to see it through and work with people over a couple months or a year to really see the change.
[00:24:39] Elli Richter: All the way. I have plenty of people that just come for quick, you know, updates this, but the big magic I see with people like you, you know, where you're there and you're really building on these practices. So I provide people still with the same benefits they get from a coach, the habits, you know, really building healthy habits.
[00:24:59] Elli Richter: And [00:25:00] stepping into their zone of genius, but doing so by making sure you have the program first. So that's not hard because in traditional coaching, what I noticed, it's really hard to, to slay all those fears and to take action while you're operating on trauma. So it's possible, anything is possible with willpower, but it's hard, right?
[00:25:21] Elli Richter: It's hard to build a business. It's hard to make a change. with behavior changes alone. So I love to combine both of that. I [00:25:30] teach people the best of the best somatic tools that I think. I don't think they have to be complicated. One of my favorite is the vagus nerve basic exercise, where you just tune your vagus nerve.
[00:25:40] Elli Richter: I can teach it to you right now if you want, but like, yeah, that's one of the things that I do. Right away so that people feel resourced with just the best things for them Know why and then for the rest of their lives has the right resources Because the truth is for the rest of our lives. We have to do things differently if we want to maintain [00:26:00] optimal health and well being And consciousness and our depth in relationships the spiritual connection and meaning Being present as an everyday choice and everyday practice.
[00:26:11] Elli Richter: So I like to resource my life partners, my clients with S with the practices so that they can do that, you know? So while we're working with psyche in session, I'll also teach them little tools and they also can message me between sessions when they have questions. And that's usually how I teach them the tools.
[00:26:27] Elli Richter: And I have a couple of videos, you know, like [00:26:30] here, do this, do that body scans. And I think those tools are really important. However, when you teach just behavioral tools without also updating the software, it's hard. It's hard to change your behaviors without changing your beliefs because your behaviors are literally a printout of your software.
[00:26:50] Elli Richter: Your behavior is a printout of your beliefs. Like if you ha if you grew up Eating unhealthy foods, that's your subconscious program. So [00:27:00] trying to eat healthy is going to be every day a hard battle. You can totally do it, but it takes about all the energy you have to not eat the cookie. You know, and then eventually after a couple months of gruel, it might become your new normal, but every time you get stressed, hand is back in the cookie jar.
[00:27:16] Elli Richter: Now, when you do subconscious change first, or along with that, All of that will feel so much easier because it's actually already your software and you don't have to fight so hard against your, your [00:27:30] priming, you know,
[00:27:30] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Yeah.
[00:27:31] Elli Richter: to answer your question, how I'm
[00:27:32] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, no, I know. I love that. And actually, so I want you to teach us the tool, but before that, so this whole thing, I um, this was in 2020. Yeah. The fall of 2020. I enrolled in the life coach school. I didn't, Necessarily think that I wanted to be a life coach, but I was like, it would be really great to learn these tools and, you know, just go deeper with it.
[00:27:55] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I enrolled in the life coach school like four months in, I was like, this [00:28:00] isn't it. Like, I didn't know what it was, but I was like, this is hard. Like, and I see people getting like amazing results. Actually, a lot of friends who are coaches who were trained at the life coach school. But something in me just knew that this wasn't it.
[00:28:14] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And I don't know why I just, when I decide something's not aligned, I just. Quit. And so it was like, even though it was like some crazy amount, like 18, 000 or something, I was like two lessons away from finishing. And then I would have just had to like stay in for six months of [00:28:30] like weekly calls or something.
[00:28:31] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And I was like, I'm out and I just left. And then now that I understand the subconscious. I understand like I was recognizing that that wasn't it. Like you said, it's hard if you are fighting the program, you can do it, but there's this whole piece that's missing. And it's a big piece when we're talking about 95 to 99 percent of everything is our consciousness is driven by, the subconscious.
[00:28:55] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I, I, I wanted to say that because I. You know, there's these [00:29:00] things that we know, we know, we just don't know what exactly why. And, and so, it's interesting with that piece. And then also, I think it would be really good for you just to briefly describe what human design is so that people know, cause we definitely have not talked about that on the show.
[00:29:15] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I think giving a brief introduction to that, and then I'd love to do the Vegas nerve tuning.
[00:29:20] Elli Richter: yeah, and, uh, you know, I love that you had that experience and that's so your human design that you, that you basically knew it's not working and you quit. I love that [00:29:30] so much. I love that. And I don't know you very well, but I love you already because to me, that's a true, like masterful skill to know what's not for you.
[00:29:39] Elli Richter: And then to not even like. You know, stay obligated. Good for you. Good for you. human design is a bit woo woo. So I recognize also this audience, you know, so this might stretch you a bit, but it's been also around for about three decades. And it's kind of a self awareness tool that gives you a blueprint and an understanding of your energetics.
[00:29:59] Elli Richter: And [00:30:00] there's five different archetypes. And each archetype is very different. And then which, which Under each archetype, there's so much information that just really helps you to discover your purpose, how your, what lifestyle is best for you, how you best manifest. What's the qualities about you, your gifts.
[00:30:17] Elli Richter: You get to discover so much about your gifts. And I discovered it in 2016 and really helps me to understand myself. And it helped me to be way more in alignment with what's right for me, all the way from [00:30:30] lifestyle to my business. So I can highly recommend it. I wrote a little introductory book about it, that you can get on Amazon just to get sort of like the, the, the skinny on it, so to speak, it's called WTF is human design.
[00:30:43] Elli Richter: And I talk a lot about psyche in that book as well, because once you discover human design, you also discover how deeply programmed you are, how deeply brainwashed you are. And many of us are brainwashed to, to be someone that we think we should be. You know, I thought [00:31:00] I should be a doctor. My dad always told me this, my daughter, Elizabeth, she's going to be a doctor.
[00:31:05] Elli Richter: And so I had this program that I should do something academic. And I told you how much that program really impacted me. Really, and I had two college degrees later because I always thought that's what I had to do. So human design helps you very clearly to become aware of how deeply programmed you are and in which way, and then how you can unlearn all that to become your most authentic self.
[00:31:27] Elli Richter: It's really fun. You know, it's a [00:31:30] really fun, very meaningful, but also very, shadow worky confronting material because it's, yeah, it's powerful. Yeah.
[00:31:38] Dr. Katie Deming MD: I love it. Well, and I just recently kind of learned about human design, and I will say that the one thing that was super helpful for me as a generator was just learning that I should respond to things, wait for things to come to me and then respond rather than initiating, actions. Things, and this was huge for [00:32:00] me because my whole career and life, I've been just making shit happen.
[00:32:04] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Just like forcing, you know, and I've got like a lot of will and I can use my will and I can get stuff done, but it felt so hard. And what's been freeing about knowing that part of my design was just like, Oh, I can just respond. So now as things come in and, and I love that, actually, I love like that you put that together with.
[00:32:24] Dr. Katie Deming MD: The, life coach school. It's like, now I just know in my gut, I'm like, I, I know when something's right [00:32:30] or wrong and I just go with that. And that, that's really how I live now. And it's been so freeing and also like less tiring, you know, then, then trying to make things happen that, that aren't necessarily meant to happen.
[00:32:42] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I love it. Thank you for sharing that. And I love that you had that book. I'm going to check that out. cause I don't know very much about it myself. Um, so, but do you want to do the Vegas tuning with
[00:32:50] Elli Richter: Oh, yes, absolutely. Okay. So, this exercise, let me actually give credit where credit is due. So if you're a practitioner and you're listening or if you [00:33:00] are dealing with cancer and you're listening or if you are just wanting to start somewhere, this tool is something that can help you, especially compounded if you use it every day, multiple times a day, it can help you come out of dysregulation and Stanley Rosenberg, who wrote the book Accessing the Healing Power of the Vagus Nerve, he came up with it and and, Very, very skilled hands on therapist.
[00:33:25] Elli Richter: So let's do the basic exercise. Normally, when you do it the first time, you want [00:33:30] to lie down for it, just in case your body responds, you know. So if you are listening, I invite you to lie down, and since you and I are sitting and we're not going to fall over, and it's really not dangerous at all, but just in case, we want to start by bringing our hands behind our heads.
[00:33:45] Elli Richter: And relax the shoulders. And we're only doing that to support the head so that it doesn't move because in a moment we'll look to the sides. So you don't want to turn your head or your heart. So you keep your head perfectly still, and then look to the left, to the [00:34:00] right, just parallel to the floor and gently breathe until you yawn, sigh, or swallow, and then say, okay. Okay,
[00:34:12] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Okay.
[00:34:13] Elli Richter: and then you can close your eyes and just allow yourself to notice the difference between the right side and the left side. Notice any sensation. You can also relax your hands in your lap right now and just kind of notice and tune into your body and see if you can even feel the anatomy of the [00:34:30] vagus nerve, your brain connecting to your heart, connecting to your gut, and your gut connecting to your heart to your brain, that cohesion. And then when you're ready, bring your hands behind your head again and look to the left. The same thing, so you don't turn your head, you just look to the side until you yawn, sigh, or swallow. And the yawn, sigh, or swallow is a sign that your nervous system is shifting, downshifting, back into a parasympathetic state, into the state of rest and digest.
[00:34:57] Elli Richter: So you can do this exercise first thing in the [00:35:00] morning while you're still in bed. And every single time you go to the bathroom, you always want to wait for the yawn, sigh, or swallow. And then when it comes, just say, okay, did it come?
[00:35:10] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Mm hmm. Okay.
[00:35:11] Elli Richter: Then just give yourself a moment, tune into your body so that you can just in a moment, report back to what that felt like for you. Super easy.
[00:35:20] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Yeah, soup. It was really easy. And also like I felt it and I, what was interesting and I, I can see the doctor part of me [00:35:30] was like trying to figure out like, well, if it's this side of the brain, but when I look to the right after that and tuned into my body, it felt relaxed on the right side. And I was worried like, well, if I was doing the right side, it shouldn't be the left side.
[00:35:43] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Anyway, I was overthinking for sure. But I did feel that like a relaxing. Just kind of like a decreased tone almost. And, and I noticed it more in the right side of my body. And then as I did the left side, it just felt even and [00:36:00] like relaxed. That was, that's what I felt inside.
[00:36:04] Elli Richter: Beautiful. Now, I want to speak to this a little bit because I'm the type of person you tell me, Hey, do this and it changes your life and I'll do it. But if I know the science behind it, I'll do it even more. You know, so the science behind this is think about like, And this is comes all the way full circle back to my physio, my physical therapy degree.
[00:36:23] Elli Richter: My first passion, my first passion was physical healing. And the fact that our body is divinely intelligent [00:36:30] and already is already whole and perfect and we are already whole and perfect and already know how to be well and that there's certain things we can press or adjust in our system to get better and the vagus nerve is one of them and working directly with this nerve is so empowering because it brings your brain your heart and your gut into cohesion and when the vagus nerve is not you operating up optionally, then we have those seven heads of the Hydra issues.
[00:36:57] Elli Richter: We have gut health issues, migraines, neck pain, [00:37:00] uh, heart palpitations, anxiety, like all the things that can all be traced back to a dysregulated nervous system, including. like codependency or addiction, you know, including those type of behavioral things. So this is almost like you're turning on the flip in a fuse box, you know, in your house, when the lights off, this is exactly what you're doing in your body.
[00:37:20] Elli Richter: You're turning on your physiology. And then you can come back into that window of tolerance that I mentioned earlier. And you can handle life better again. You can come online again. You [00:37:30] feel more peace, more relaxation. You're not so hypervigilant or depleted that you can't function. You know, you're coming back into your energetics.
[00:37:38] Elli Richter: So do this first thing in the morning. And then every time you go to the bathroom and why don't you go on your personal experiment with this? And we'll talk again in a week or two. And you'll let me know. I've seen so many great changes combining this with Psyche, especially when it comes to addiction.
[00:37:55] Elli Richter: I've, I've worked with a lot of people with addiction, whether that's eating disorders or [00:38:00] alcohol addiction or other form of, symptoms of trauma, you know, addiction is a symptom of trauma. It's been profound. So this vagus nerve, when it's dysregulated, creates all kinds of chaos in the body. And when it's nice and toned, It creates naturally a state of harmony and helps the body restore homeostasis. It's so much of the therapeutic approaches when your vagus nerve is not working. It's almost like it can't really take a hold, you know? [00:38:30] And then once your vagus nerve is actually working, the therapeutic approaches are working better. So whatever you're doing right now, wherever you are, however, who's listening, do this, do this every day.
[00:38:39] Elli Richter: It's so easy. Everybody can do it. Kids love it. All my clients, kids love it. Like, can we do the basic exercise? And I call it frequency tuning because We're always looking to be in the frequency of that which we want to embody, right? And so if you're dysregulated, if you're depressed and you can't be social and connect because your system is so [00:39:00] dysregulated, then we can't embody the frequency we want to be in.
[00:39:03] Elli Richter: So this is a real big game changer. And together with Psyche, I think they go so beautifully hand in hand because with Psyche, okay, you help the Delete the trauma and unpack your emotional garbage backpack, you know, every time we feel a feeling we don't want to feel we put it back there so we can unpack that with Psyche and can help you have a new set point in your nervous system from set point of anxious, you can get [00:39:30] to a set point of peace.
[00:39:31] Elli Richter: A lot of people say I'm just an anxious person. No, you're not. You're just living with a lot of dysregulated, you know, unresolved trauma. That's just regulating your, your system. So you can create a new set point. And then with the vagus nerve toning exercise every day, you can not only stay in the window of tolerance, but build it.
[00:39:48] Elli Richter: And then imagine what happens when you stay and build your window of tolerance, the amount of leadership. You can step into the amount of joy you can experience, the amount of pleasure you can experience, the amount of generosity that [00:40:00] you can give with the amount of access of solutions that you have and consciousness that you can operate on to give, to serve, to connect.
[00:40:08] Elli Richter: It's the best.
[00:40:09] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Well, and, I think this is this exercise for my listeners is really powerful and especially if you're dealing with an illness and particularly with cancer, because One of the biggest enemies when you're sick is fear people are in a constant state of fear And this is one of the things that I talk about a lot We have [00:40:30] to get out of fear because healing Doesn't happen in the body when we're in a state of fear and we need to get to peace And so this is a tool that Ellie just taught us that you can use and I Everyone should be using this tool.
[00:40:45] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I'm going to be using this. And I have a question though. Why after each time you go to the bathroom?
[00:40:50] Elli Richter: Oh, just because it, I love that you asked that. for asking that. Sorry. Sometimes I'm so excited that I jump over five, five little steps. I, [00:41:00] when you try to establish a behavior, it's always good to couple it with something you're doing regularly.
[00:41:05] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Habit
[00:41:06] Elli Richter: You know, yeah. So you're just stacking it. Exactly. So in the bathroom, because everybody goes to the bathroom quite a bit, you know, that's a good time.
[00:41:14] Elli Richter: And so a lot of my clients put a sticky note with their eyeball in their bathroom. They know to do it every time they're in the bathroom. And that's just habit stacking. Yes.
[00:41:22] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Yeah, I love it. I was like, is there something physiologic happen when we're going to the bathroom? But no, I love that. Well, and I love. I [00:41:30] love the, that you teach it that way because then it's just easy. You don't have to remember do this five times a day or whatever. If you're just every time you go in the bathroom and the sticky note is really good.
[00:41:39] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So if anyone is doing this, giving yourself a little reminder is really important because we're creatures of habit. And until this becomes a new habit for you, you want to have those little reminders. So, I love that. And I think, you know, the, Last thing that I'd like to ask you about, Ellie, is, you know, [00:42:00] there's this connection between trauma and illness in the body and people being afraid of going back and re traumatizing.
[00:42:11] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And so one of the things that I would like you to speak to is, you've said that this is simple and this is easy. But one of the things that I find is people Many of my clients have gotten into a pattern of suppressing emotions because it's too painful, and I'm [00:42:30] wondering, you know, if you can speak to that, I, I know, just from experiencing site K, but, and you talked a little bit about bringing, you know, the superpower of bringing both the hemispheres of the brain online, but explaining just a little bit of.
[00:42:44] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Why this doesn't re traumatize people. Why it is safe to do this kind of work in, in, in this, with this particular modality.
[00:42:53] Elli Richter: Yes, what a great question. And before I answer that, I do would really love to [00:43:00] highlight what I just heard you say that the biggest enemy to healing is fear and fear is a belief that scares the shit out of you. And just in the belief is just a thought we keep thinking and not everything we think is true.
[00:43:15] Elli Richter: And the hardest thing with fear is because we it feels true in our physiology. We believe it, but it's just a subconscious belief that's scaring the shit out of us. So all fears are beliefs that can be changed. I just want to say that in case [00:43:30] that kind of like, you know, gets lost in all of this information.
[00:43:33] Elli Richter: All these fears that we have, they feel so real. Because there's subconscious program and the subconscious governs our body and our nervous system. Just because it feels real doesn't mean the fear is real, and that's the hard part about working with fears. And the beautiful thing is you can shift out of that within seconds, just like you can with the trauma, because what's really happening is, When a terrible event happens that's emotionally charged and we [00:44:00] don't have the time or space to fully release the emotional charge, the subconscious keeps it because the subconscious is the part of our consciousness that keeps score all the time, is always on, never sleeps, always records every single detail.
[00:44:15] Elli Richter: And the subconscious mind is always in the present moment. It doesn't have a concept of past, present, and future. So when you're working with a stressful memory or when a, when a trauma or stressful event is still unresolved, it feels like it [00:44:30] happened yesterday. And that's what the re traumatizing part is when people talk about it or visit it, then their entire physiology within seconds.
[00:44:40] Elli Richter: And this goes back into that event. And that's what's so challenging. And when you do that without a modality, you actually solve it. It can be re traumatizing. With Psyche, you'll be sitting in what's called a whole brain state, where your physiology is safe, your hemispheres are [00:45:00] open, and you get to revisit the memory.
[00:45:03] Elli Richter: So there'll be a quick peak of distress. And then it dissipates. And then maybe a few more waves of distress. And within a few minutes, that entire event, the emotional charge dissolves like it is meant to. We're all capable and equipped and actually built to dissolve the emotional charge of events eventually.
[00:45:24] Elli Richter: And once the emotional charges dissolved, our consciousness can begin to see the event as what [00:45:30] it is, something that happened in the past that cannot hurt us anymore. You know, so the emotional charge then leaves the system and that's why you can't, and then you can think about the event again and again and again and again and won't hurt you anymore.
[00:45:43] Elli Richter: People are like, I have some clients that are like, so I tried, I tried to go back in the trauma and I can't, you know, because they're like, let me touch it one more time. Can I hurt it? And it doesn't, you know, you can't, once you solve it, it's done. The longest somebody took to work through something was maybe 20 [00:46:00] minutes.
[00:46:00] Elli Richter: So think about worst case scenario, 20 minutes versus living for the rest of your life with unresolved stress. That's basically slow drip killing the quality of your life, if not your body. You know, to me, it's kind of like a little bit uncomfortable for a few minutes versus for the rest of your life.
[00:46:19] Elli Richter: And it's really, really safe. And within seconds, even while you're working through it. the worst is done. So it's almost like a, you know, few seconds discomfort and then it [00:46:30] resolves. I cannot tell you scientifically exactly how it works. It's, it's hard to scientifically, step by step. We just know we're working with quantum physics.
[00:46:39] Elli Richter: We're working with the whole brain state. We've measured it. So you can see in a, I think EKG, right? EEG. EEG, where you see an EEG at first a lot of stress and within 15 seconds homeostasis. So it happens very quickly that we can release. And I have [00:47:00] never had a person not being able to release that trauma.
[00:47:03] Elli Richter: Never. You
[00:47:04] Dr. Katie Deming MD: It's so fascinating. Yeah. Well, and I think, you know, one of the things though, and I'm not sure how, who explained this to me, but the whole brain state that oftentimes when we experience emotions, we. And so, we either go into our right brain and become very emotional and then feel like we're going to be overtaken by the emotions and, and feel like we're going to lose control, or we go into the left brain and we over [00:47:30] analyze and basically don't feel it and just explain it away.
[00:47:34] Dr. Katie Deming MD: By doing the whole the positioning for the whole brain state is it creates a safety where you can experience that distress, but it feels more manageable, even though you feel the emotion getting big. There's a safety to that, doing that with that positioning and having the whole brain state, both sides of your brain activated allows you to experience that.
[00:47:59] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And [00:48:00] one of the things for me that it's given me is confidence in my ability to experience emotions and not be overtaken by them. Because it does, Psych K does take the charge out of. past traumatic events. So you exactly what you described is what I've experienced is I can think of the same event, and it just doesn't have the same emotional charge.
[00:48:21] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And I'm like, why is that? It was so like, it had me so like, just incapacitated. And now it's like, I can think about it just has no hold on me. That's [00:48:30] like my experience with Psyche that I've had. But then the other thing that it's done is Is that when I experience emotions, being able to go into that positioning has given me greater, emotional fluency to just experience emotions and realizing that, oh, when you learn.
[00:48:50] Dr. Katie Deming MD: these positioning for whole brain states, it makes you much more fluent in experiencing emotions since we're humans. And we're going to experience emotions every day [00:49:00] for the rest of our life. So these skills, even when you clear the past trauma, you're still learning tools that are going to help you experience future trauma and let the emotions run through and not have it overtake you and re traumatize you in a new way.
[00:49:14] Elli Richter: I love that you just said the emotional piece because, I have several pillars in subconscious somatic integrative therapy. And one of the pillars is emotional self regulation, learning how to parent yourself. When you're in that window of tolerance, your emotions can actually [00:49:30] flow through again. So a lot of people when they're living with chronic trauma, let's say you have cancer and you are in that state of like, You know, going from treatment to treatment and just like discombobulated you're outside of the window of tolerance.
[00:49:42] Elli Richter: You might not even feel your feelings at all, or you might be so emotional that you can't like, you know, go through a day without flooding, you know? So people respond to trauma exactly the way you described either very left brained or very right brained. Meaning you can get into a place of severe hypervigilance [00:50:00] with trauma and become very controlling or completely out of control.
[00:50:05] Elli Richter: And most people. can identify, Oh yeah, that person must have trauma when they're living out of control. You know, when there's a lot of, you can sense there might be some addiction or their life is completely out of control. It's easy to kind of say that's probably trauma. Whereas the hypervigilance is not that easy to spot as a trauma response, but becoming very controlling is also a trauma response.
[00:50:26] Elli Richter: And when we're in that state, we don't feel we're actually in a state of. The [00:50:30] nervous system is in a state of frozen, right? Numb where you're in a so called dorsal vagal state where your vagus nerve is in a dorsal vagus state where you can't feel. And then once you use psyche and you can, you're back in the window of tolerance, the emotions actually can safely move through.
[00:50:47] Elli Richter: And the more you unpack old stuff, the less Stuff you feel on a day to day. So most people, when they get upset, they're not upset about the traffic. They are upset about what happened last year [00:51:00] and yesterday and the year before and 10 years ago. And it all is like in this moment of somebody cutting us off in traffic and we lose our shit so hard that we might go bonkers.
[00:51:09] Elli Richter: It's, we're never upset about what we think we are. It's always, like every time you have a, an emotion, you also feel any other emotion or any other event that was similar in nature. So the more you clear your subconscious, the less intense every emotions are. And the more you are able to stay in the window of [00:51:30] tolerance and the easier your emotions also flow through.
[00:51:33] Elli Richter: That's basically how you can get rid of addictions. I've had some clients that. Uh, didn't even realize they had a dependency on alcohol or used it a lot until they unpacked and eventually they realized, I stopped drinking alcohol without even realizing, I don't need the bottle of wine anymore at night because I'm now in the window of tolerance, my emotions are moving through easier, I'm more confident in feeling my emotions and feel more equipped overall to handle life.
[00:51:59] Elli Richter: And so I love that [00:52:00] you brought that up because emotions are such an interesting topic and always reflect what's going on in the subconscious. So the more your subconscious is on board with what you want and desire, the better you feel overall. And the easier it is for you to navigate your day to day emotions.
[00:52:17] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Yeah. Well, and I love the, what you said about the numbing. This is, I saw this in my practice. So my practice, I was a radiation oncologist. I treated mostly women with breast [00:52:30] cancer. I did breast and gynecologic cancers, but it was a very common pattern that I saw with women with breast cancer. usually with breast cancer, you'd have.
[00:52:39] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Surgery, chemotherapy and radiation, the order may vary, but radiation was usually kind of the last thing, last active treatment that people had before they were kind of released from the doctors and, um, kind of back to regular life, although it's not, you know, normal after that you're, you're definitely changed.
[00:52:58] Dr. Katie Deming MD: But I would see [00:53:00] this thing that would happen is that they were. Like doing okay, doing okay, doing okay. And then we're getting right towards the end of treatment and they think that they're going to feel amazing, but they actually feel horrible. And I, with hearing what you just said is that they were in a trauma response and numbing, and so they weren't feeling anything.
[00:53:20] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And I really would encourage clients at that or patients at that point to say. Okay, don't when you start feeling anxious and depressed and [00:53:30] all this stuff starts coming up as you're finishing the treatment Please don't push it down because if you push it down and don't deal with it It's gonna be like whack a mole coming up and like you're yelling at your kids or you're yelling at your husband or you know And it's gonna show up but it's like I didn't realize that really what they were doing was numbing because they're in a trauma response and then finally when they're finishing the treatment and now they have You The space to deal with it, all of this stuff comes flooding in.
[00:53:57] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And so this is important for anyone [00:54:00] listening to this is that when you finish active treatment for cancer or any other disease, you may have not been able to handle dealing with the emotions and the. Like impact of the diagnosis while you were going through treatment because you were just busy surviving and making it through, but that this opportunity when this stuff comes up and it's really uncomfortable and people are like, why am I not excited?
[00:54:27] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Like ringing the bell at the end of [00:54:30] radiation and celebrating, like, I see people finishing treatment on social media. I'm so excited. Why do I feel like. Hell, I feel terrible. I feel anxious. And it's because all this stuff is coming up. This is an opportunity to do this kind of work. And actually, that's what I do with my clients is that if they're doing some conventional treatment, we may start to do a little bit of work if they have the capacity.
[00:54:50] Dr. Katie Deming MD: But a lot of times it's not until someone finishes treatment that they can go into doing this deeper kind of work.
[00:54:56] Elli Richter: I, I still love that you exist [00:55:00] and that you're doing what you're doing and that you're following your call so courageously. and, and I love that psyche exists and these tools exist. And yes, when you're, I never had cancer, but my dad went through it. So, witnessing how out of the sudden our world went from, you know, all the distraction to acutely present.
[00:55:18] Elli Richter: Acutely present. And you're so acutely present during that time. You can't, you can't go anywhere. You know, you're just in the present, you're thinking about surviving. And then once that's done and your nervous system has a [00:55:30] sense of safety again, you know, and then you're slowly coming back in the window of tolerance, yes, you might be hit with like crazy ass emotion.
[00:55:38] Elli Richter: And that's the same reason that we sometimes have postpartum depression, those types of things. The, once something has, once we're through it. And the thing, whatever the thing is, has happened. Our body and our system is like, Oh my gosh, what just happened? You know? What just happened? And then it starts to kick in all those fears.
[00:55:57] Elli Richter: Trauma isn't just what happened for [00:56:00] you. It's also what we make that mean about ourselves. So this is one thing I really want to say about trauma. It isn't just what happened. It's also what we made that mean. And usually when something happens, like cancer, it's not just what happened. You never probably thought until you had this experience about a lot of things about yourself, but then you start to get scared and a lot of limiting beliefs form from that experience.
[00:56:22] Elli Richter: Does this mean it's my fault? Does this mean I'm flawed? Does this mean I'm not good enough? Did I do something wrong? Is it my fault? Is my body letting me down? Does this [00:56:30] mean like my future is not colored by, you know, like there's so many thoughts that rush in that are also re traumatizing all the time?
[00:56:37] Elli Richter: So it isn't just the event. That makes the dysregulation, but also all these beliefs that form based on that event.
[00:56:44] Dr. Katie Deming MD: love that you just said that because that is so true. And I think this is part of what I was frustrated with Western medicine is that we make people believe that they can't trust their body because we tell [00:57:00] them, we don't know why you got cancer. Most of the time, most of the time, We say, we don't know why.
[00:57:04] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And then we're like, it's just bad luck or who knows. And then, so then people stop trusting their body and they've given all their power over to the doctors or, you know, whoever it is, that's going to fix them. Right. And so there's this, these limiting beliefs that develop. And I never thought about that.
[00:57:22] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Like, I knew that I didn't like that about medicine, but it's like, what you're saying is true that. Some of these limiting beliefs [00:57:30] are actually reinforced or created by our traditional healthcare system. And you said this earlier in the episode, it's like, you're the healer, you're the medicine. And that's one of the things that I love about my practice now is that I approach it, I'm not the healer.
[00:57:46] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Like my clients are, they're, they're their own healers. I'm just helping them. Open and, and guiding them in their own process. And it's different for everyone. And that's why I love there's so many different tools that, that people [00:58:00] can use, but psyche and the specific way that you're doing with subconscious integrative therapy is just beautiful.
[00:58:06] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I'm so glad that, that we were able to meet and talk today and to share with my audience. And if people are interested in your work or interested in working with you, how can they find you?
[00:58:17] Elli Richter: Yes, you can find me, on my website, ellyrichter. com and, or Instagram. I am, that's the only social media platform that I use, ellyrichter, really easy. And you can just send me a message or a schedule [00:58:30] of a free conversation and we can talk. And if I may, I would really love to share, I think we're really moving into a new paradigm.
[00:58:36] Elli Richter: I have no idea how we get there, but I'm so here for it. And I think it's the paradigm that exactly you're, you're in, that we are our own healers and that, the expansion of consciousness is what's going to help us truly access the magic that's in our bodies. And that disease is our bodies and our spirits way [00:59:00] of guiding us.
[00:59:01] Elli Richter: I've dealt with a lot of chronic pain and disease in my own life. lots of pain and pain has been my greatest teacher. And it wasn't until I surrendered deeply surrendered into the pain and allowed it to teach me that I recognize that disease and pain is not a punishment. It's not because you did anything wrong and it's also not the end of your life.
[00:59:23] Elli Richter: It's usually a great awakening. And if we shift the paradigm and our belief, how looking at that [00:59:30] and welcome it a little bit more and get out of this paradigm of pathologizing and fixing into the paradigm of listening and understanding and getting curious and taking personal, taking back our personal power.
[00:59:43] Elli Richter: I think. It's very exciting what's coming. And I know that's hard to hear when you're in it and when you're in pain. And I'm not saying you need to adopt that mindset. This is just something I come to and I find very empowering, to look at disease and physical feedback that way. [01:00:00] And to, to, to get curious of what our body is telling us.
[01:00:03] Elli Richter: and cancer from a spiritual perspective from I've worked with a lot of people through cancer. It's always very interesting. And there's a lot of beautiful, if you're open to it, opportunity in the journey, for your healing, for your growth, for your spiritual journey. And so the people that are, that have, asked that question, I've gotten curious about it has been rewarded with a depth that I can't even describe, you know,
[01:00:28] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Yeah. Well, [01:00:30] and in Chinese, you know, cancer is a crisis, but crisis is represented by two symbols. The first symbol is danger and the second symbol is opportunity. And like any crisis, there is the opportunity for growth and it's not what happens to you, but what you take from that and how do you use it.
[01:00:52] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And that's actually why I love being with people who have cancer is because Shit gets real when [01:01:00] someone is facing a life threatening illness, and I love being in that space because there is so much opportunity for positive change and complete transformation of your life. And it, it happens for different people at different times during their journey, but I think that cancer or any other serious illness like that really, you know, Changes people.
[01:01:21] Dr. Katie Deming MD: And when you can see it as like, okay, you know, yes, there's danger. So it's like, you know, deal with the danger, but then see the [01:01:30] opportunity that what am I taking away from this? Like, what is the, the lesson that I want to take forward out of this experience? It may be painful, to go through through that pain, you know, is the transformation.
[01:01:45] Dr. Katie Deming MD: So I love that you shared that. Thank you, Ellie, for being with me today. It was truly my pleasure to meet you and spend time with you.
[01:01:52] Elli Richter: Same. Thank you so much, Dr. Katie.
[01:01:55] Dr. Katie Deming MD: Thank you for [01:02:00] joining me on Born to Heal. It's been a privilege to share this time with you, and I hope that today's episode has offered you valuable insights on your journey toward optimal health. Please consider subscribing, sharing this podcast with your friends, and leaving us a review. To learn more about how you can work with me, please visit katydemming.
[01:02:19] Dr. Katie Deming MD: com. You can find additional resources in the episode show notes linked below, and remember to join us next week as we continue to explore more holistic [01:02:30] approaches to healing. Until then, this is Dr. Katie Deming reminding you that just like me, you were born to heal.
DISCLAIMER:
The Born to Heal Podcast is intended for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for seeking professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Individual medical histories are unique; therefore, this episode should not be used to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease without consulting your healthcare provider.